When I decided that my calling was in the rabbinate, I met with my rabbi to discuss my decision. Part of our discussion focused on the interview that I would have to undergo at the institution that I was applying to. My rabbi/teacher read my essays of application, told me about the wonders and joys of serving in God's vineyard, and told me about his many years of service. I left his presence uplifted and more determined than ever that this was my calling in life.

My next step was to buy a new shirt, tie and suit for the interview. My father took me to the local men's store and I picked out a suitable suit. When I met with the tailor, an elderly Jewish gentleman my father couldn't help but brag to him that his son was going to be a rabbi. The tailor's reaction was my introduction to the rabbinate. He began confessing to me his many sins, including why he didn't go to synagogue more often. I realized he was asking me to tell him that he is a good Jew.

After 23 years in the rabbinate I have experienced many similar moments, and it is clear to me that Jews often feel a deep-seated need to confess. As we approach the Days of Awe, Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, I am reminded that the liturgy for our special High Holyday prayer book requires us to confess....early and often!

The machzor, the special high holyday prayer book, has many different sins that we confess. Note the following text written close to two thousand years ago:

O God, I have acted perversely, I have transgressed, I have sinned before You, I and my household. O God, please atone for the iniquities, for the transgressions, and for the sins which I have acted perversely, which I have transgressed, and which I have sinned before You, I and my household, as it is written in the Torah of your servant Moses, saying (Leviticus 16:30): "For on this day [He shall atone you to purify you from all your sins before the Lord shall you be purified.]"

This text, taken from the Mishnah, which contains material that was edited in the year 200 AD, is written in the first person. It is a confession that was uttered by the High Priest on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, in the temple. Today, our machzor requires Jews to confess their sins in the plural. We don't confess our sins to anybody, nor do we articulate in public which particular sins we have committed.

In their great wisdom, the great rabbis who compiled the machzor and asked Jews to confess in the plural, and not the singular, were reminding us that we all have the potential to sin and transgress. Here is a litany of ways that you can go wrong...gossip, stealing, sins of omission, etc. Not every phrase will apply to you, but these confessions should act as a reminder of ways that we can stumble.

That doesn't mean that we don't confess our sins to those whom we have wronged. In fact, our tradition requires us to apologize, make restitution and ask for forgiveness....directly, from those we have sinned against. But that is a private, not a public matter.

I'd like to conclude with a true story about one of the great rabbis of the 20^th century, Rabbi Simon Greenberg. Rabbi Greenberg was a ‘gutene neshama', a truly good and pious soul. He was once approached by a student who had just finished officiating at a synagogue during the High Holy Days. In frustration, he confessed to his teacher:

"Professor Greenberg, I simply can't take the Al Het (the long confessional) anymore! Forty-four sins repeated [many] times - it's just too much!" And Dr. Greenberg said to him: "Of course it is. I haven't said them all for years."

(The student) was taken aback. Could it be that his teacher, who was such a genuinely pious person, hadn't recited the Al Het in years? "What do you mean?" he asked. "It's very simple," said Dr. Greenberg. "What I do each time is I choose one of the sins on the list, one that applies to me. And I think about its implications and meditate on how and why I committed it - and by the time I am finished thinking about that one sin, the rest of the people have finished reciting the whole list." (Rabbi Jack Riemer, The World of the High Holy Days, Miami, 1991, p. 301).

Rabbi Greenberg understood intuitively that the purpose of confessing is not to go through a lengthy list, and then say we have finished. The purpose of confessing is to acknowledge to ourselves what our flaws are, and to begin changing them. A good lesson to learn during the High Holyday season...and any other time.

May we all be inscribed well in the Book of Life,

Happy New Year,

Rabbi David Ebstein